For as long as we know it, we will never forget those who hurt us or who has caused harm upon us and our loved ones.
This is only natural because hurt and pain was inflicted upon us by someone else. It could’ve also been the circumstance that caused you hurt, not necessarily an actual person. Maybe the situation put before you, left you with no choice but to result in you getting hurt in some form or way. Now inspite of knowing all this and being aware, we still won’t forget 3 things.
1) What caused us hurt
2) Who hurt us
3) And the outcome of what happened to us because of that experience.
Some of us were affected emotionally and mentally, which resulted to being damaged for life and some even had permanent physical change (weight loss/gain) or damage to the self (like loss of sight, hearing, paralysis, suicide).
If you’ve not reached this point of damage, then there are ways to prevent this as much as you can.
You need to understand why we fall?
– Falling (the human experience that lead to failure, disappointment or grief and misery) is the process of learning who we are. The experience of hurt and hardship acts as a carving tool. It polishes you to the point of the very core of your being. “Falling” is the bridge to ~ ignite Life Changing Resolutions, ~ to spark Conscience and ~ to influence Revolution of Thoughts, your Thoughts.
The beautiful thing is, you are the one holding the carving tool because YOU are the carver of how excellent of a work of art you’d become due to that horrid or traumatic experience.
Be forgiving. That’s a tough one most times, even for me. Be kind. Show empathy especially for the ones that are incapable of love or kindness, even to those that speak hurtful words and do things to disrespect you or dishonor you, defend yourself but speak with kind words not with hateful words. *To note, that pointed out, I actually have said a lot of mean stuff to one or two particular people in my whole Life due to their stubborness and incapability of kindness #becausetheydeserveit . I will let out my bullets once you’ve crossed the line of absolute disrespect and harmful doing. And at my level to those who know me as a Peace and Love advocate~ that must’ve taken a lot.
I’ve experienced this with family and loved ones before and it is a tough cookie to bite BUT I’m glad to have achieved a certain immunity to emotional instability, haha. Maybe it’s due to my job that I managed to acquire this skill.
It’s mainly disorganized and defensive emotions erupting without calm and organized thought processing. Going through years of word lashing from this handful, has really built a sort of numbness and understanding of why they say what they say.
Which is usually a few things, like jealousy, frustration, confusion, hurt, identity crisis, insecurity, self centeredness or that their core traits have narcissistic characteristics.
Apply what you’ve learned from the experience that you’ve gained. Don’t be harsh. Be fair. Be firm but don’t be vengeful. Be sincere. It will all be alright in the end. Even if you don’t see it immediately , the delayed gratification will be satisfying , it will be fair in the end. Trust me. I am living proof that it all ends well even after difficulty after difficulty, obstacles after obstacles and heartbreak after heartbreak. I’m a real happy camper in this moment of time but it wasn’t a smooth journey to get to this point.
Now that being said, the strongest hearts can also falter but it’s the result of what became of us later when we came out of the experience , is the point of the matter. Who did we become?
If we came out a better person~ that’s a gift, may blessings be upon our teachers and may the Al-Mighty guide us all , if we did not come out better than what we began with, then we must sit and reflect some more even if it took us years to overcome.
We must tell ourselves, I want to be better for the good of Mankind and because it is right.
The seeds that we grow in our hearts, the things that we speak about , the things we try to influence our friends and our families ….MUST always be in good faith.
Do not spread hatred or ill intentions , for if you do, it will return to you more than what you sow and then you must prepare for it. It is better to prepare for life lessons, not busy preparing for your retributions.
Do not harm others with the intent of hurting. Do not plot against other people ( I know a couple who actually do that for real haha) not a good use of energy I must say. Do not plan to deceive ( I also know a person who has done that to me recently in the last couple of years~ May God have mercy), do not be vengeful (there are still so many human beings doing this) it has to stop.
Defend what you must, in a respectful manner even in the eyes of your enemy.
Respond with kindness until there is no longer a means for calm gentle words than be firm, be heard and be precise. Speak to them respectfully with the intent to resolve not to dissolve their ego or destroy their reputation EVEN if that was their initial intention towards you. Remember what is your INTENT. They have their own intentions and for whatever deeds we all do, we have only ourselves, our body, our mind, our souls will answer for.
It will return to you one way or another, that’s why….you must always do your best, to do good .
Do good. Be kind. Breathe better.